What to do when you want to quit your job (but can't yet)

If you're a midlife career changer, you might find yourself feeling trapped in your current job—unable to leave just yet, but desperate for a change. It's unlikely you've made it this far in life without some responsibilities, especially financial ones. This means making a rash decision to quit your job is unnecessarily reckless. Quitting on a whim might feel tempting, but it’s rarely the best option, especially when responsibilities are involved. While a midlife career pivot may seem daunting, there is plenty of evidence out there to show that it's never too late to pursue your passions and dreams.

You've fallen out of love with your job, and have a career change dream, but you're not ready to leave your job just yet. You feel stuck in your career transition. You've invested years in your career, but now you're stuck between wanting change and fearing the unknown. Maybe you feel hemmed in financially. Perhaps you haven't quite figured out what your new 'thing' will be. This leaves you in a very lonely and mentally draining career change limbo.

Sound familiar?

What can you do when you are committed to a career transition, but you can't execute it right now?

1. Mind yourself more

If you find yourself in this career pivot dilemma, it's more critical than ever to make time to do the things that give you energy. Whatever your gender, lean heavily into self- care and the things outside of work that bring you joy. It might be exercise, spending time with friends, playing a round of golf, or simply spending time in nature. Going to a job you'd rather not is draining and depleting. Therefore, you need to find ways to refill that lost mental and emotional energy. It's the age-old adage, you can't pour from an empty cup.

2. Figure out where you can reclaim your energy

In most roles now, it's not enough to just do a good job to get ahead, you're expected to go beyond. Usually that means we're used to taking on additional responsibilities outside of our core role, signing up for extracurricular activities, sitting on various committees, taking on added projects, and even doing other people's jobs. If this is you, then maybe you need to think about reclaiming some of this added energy, and reinvesting it in yourself instead? Assess which duties extra duties at work you can reasonably cut back on without compromising your role. After all, you've a new career plan to prioritise - making your career change dreams come to life. If you're putting added energy into a job you hate, it could very well make you bitter, as well as depriving you of the chance to reinvest that energy in yourself, and your career change journey. This is not a call to arms to stay still though: of course take on projects, or flex in work, if that serves you in some way such as by adding skills or meeting new people that are relevant to your new career.

3. Create an exit plan

Career change can take time for all sorts of reasons. Even the prospect of change can be enough to carry us forward. Picturing the day you finally hand in your notice and never look back is a powerful motivator. Plotting out a tangible exit plan allows us to create a roadmap to our future self, keeping us on track to that vision with goals, milestones and professional development. Okay, so maybe financially you feel you can't change right now, but what can you do? Even if you can’t leave right away, you can still start working on your career shift today. Can you take a course? Who can you network with that will help your planned career transition? Set small, achievable goals like enrolling in a course or attending networking events, so your exit strategy feels tangible.

4. Share the load

If you only keep things inside your head, they will always feel bigger and heavier. A problem shared is a problem halved as they say. You could have a work bestie that you could secretly share your career change dreams with. Or family and friends. Keep in mind that new ideas are like seeds; they thrive in the dark and need careful nurturing, so share your career change dreams cautiously when they’re still fragile. If you don't have that support in your immediate network, it's worth investing in it. Having a career coach, like myself, can be so helpful at this stage, to both challenge and cheerlead you towards your desired midlife career transition.

5. Consider a bridge job

A career change journey is about how you get from A to B. Career changers tend to think of this as a massive switch, a major leap of faith they need to make. And while that strategy suits some, it's not the only way to do it. A bridge job, like a temporary or contract role, or simply taking on a less demanding role than you hold right now, can help give you the mental space and energy to make your ultimate career switch. If your current role is draining you mentally, a less demanding bridge job might provide the headspace needed to focus on your next steps. It becomes the bridge between A and B and can be particularly useful if financial considerations are at play. You can even try to job craft your existing role to become this bridge - for example, reducing your hours. It can create the feeling of having one foot out the door. This frees up more of your precious energy to reinvest in your career change.

6. Find the positives

While it’s easy to focus on the negatives, finding even small positives in your current job can make a big difference. It's very easy when our job is draining us to focus on the negative reasons why. The hard to work with colleagues, a difficult manager, a toxic workplace culture or an unmanageable workload. The reality is as humans that we don't do things that don't serve us in some way. This means there have to be some positives to why you're still there. Are you learning from someone? Do you enjoy the perks? It could be that you appreciate your half-paid-for massages courtesy of your health insurance! At the very least, you can go to bed knowing your salary will be in your bank account at the end of the month, providing you with enough to pay your bills. What we focus on expands, so by focusing on the positives from your current job, it will help you maintain some perspective and feelings of goodwill towards your current employer. If you are truly 'stuck', to keep yourself sane, you'll want to find a way to make the best of it.

7. Understand, and play to, your strengths

There are things that we are all naturally good at. We can spot them by understanding what is effortless to us, where we feel in flow, where we lose track of time. Can you bring more of that into your current work? Say you enjoy being creative, how can you be more creative at work? Even if you're in finance, maybe that would mean creating a new powerpoint slide format for your financial presentation decks! It will make work less stressful. Ideally pick a strength that is going to benefit your desired career change, so by the time you are ready to move, you've really honed that skill for yourself.

8. Have a secret side project

This could be work related, or personal. There is no limit here, it all depends on what could work wonders for your mood and motivation. Perhaps you work on creating a positive morning ritual, a dedicated meditation practice or work towards your goal of running a marathon. It could be that you start working with a career change coach like myself, you focus on developing a specific skill at work, or you launch a side hustle. Life is difficult without hope. Hope inspires. It is the reason we persevere and press on. Sometimes, when things are desperate, we need to put ourselves in the way of hope. This secret project will speak to that part of us that harbours the hope that things can change, that they won't always be as bleak as they are now. Why? The despair you feel is because you feel stuck. It feels like there’s no way out, that things will always be like this, and that you’ll always feel this way. By working on a secret project, it will inject passion back into your life. It becomes a lifeline of confidence and energy to the new life you are craving. Having something different and enjoyable to focus on can make all the difference.

This blog is all about helping you navigate this in between stage of career change, the 'messy' middle. Choose one or two of these career change tips to experience with over the next month. These career tips aren’t intended as another burden or something you don’t want to do. Instead, they are designed to help you become curious about what can help you as you navigate this tricky in-between period. Remember, you're not alone in how you're feeling - I know, as I've been there myself. If I can help in any way, I'd be delighted to. Speak with me, by booking a Free 30-Minute Discovery Call.

Which of these strategies appeals to you to start using in the next month? Let me know in the comments below!